Every Yes = 5 “No’s”

EVERY %22YES%22 =
Note: this article originally appeared in the April 14th issue of The Load In

This past month has been one of the busiest months I’ve ever had. Here’s a snapshot of just my last week:

Mid-Morning Rehearsal
Finish up the John Whitt Jr. Podcast that came out Friday
Prep DJ music for the weekend

Leave with the band in the morning for Fresno
Program backing tracks in the van on the way
Setup and play corporate gig in Fresno
Tear down, check into hotel, sleep.

Leave in the morning for San Miguel
Setup and play wedding in San Miguel
Tear down, pack van, drive 3 hours home.
Learn songs on the way home for tomorrow’s rehearsal
Arrive home at 4am, sleep.

Wake at 6am
Play 3 church services
Rehearsal (3pm – 11pm)

Rehearsal (11am – 8pm)

(This is a big deal, you know how serious I am about Wifeday)

Rehearsal (11am – 7pm)

Teach lessons at Citrus College (9am – 2pm)
Teach class at APU (4:15pm – 6:15pm)




I tell you this not boast or brag in any way, but to bring up an important idea : intentionality.

The snapshot above has just been the past week, but the last month has been like this. I’m currently in a strange place: half incredibly grateful for so much work, half incredibly exhausted.

I’m grateful that it’s worked out that I’ve been able to pack so much work into my schedule and make money. But at the same time, other important things have fallen by the wayside.

Things like spending time with my family, or going to the gym and eating well. After Thursday, I didn’t really see my wife or son until Monday morning. And with the exception of two-stepping while I play the bass, I haven’t moved much at all. I have, however, stuffed my face with gas station snacks and about 847556278385 cups of coffee.

I'm so tired, I don't know if the Barista screwed up my name, or if that's how I just pronounce it now. 

I’m so tired, I don’t know if the Barista screwed up my name, or if that’s how I just pronounce it now.

The problem is simple: Whenever you say “yes” to one thing, you’re saying “no” to a whole lot of other things. And this month, I’ve said “yes” to far too many things.

I’ve said “yes” to two back to back out of town gigs. I’ve said “yes” to an early Sunday morning gig after that, and “yes” to three all day rehearsals after that. Followed by teaching all day on Wednesday.

There’s nothing wrong with working and making a living. I’m all for that, and again, incredibly grateful for the work. But because of those “yes’s”, I’ve had to say “no” to holding my infant son, and “no” to being healthy.

The answer is less simple: There’s a push and pull to this, and a balance point where it all works pretty well. I have yet to find that point, but I’m going to keep trying. I’m going to be more intentional about the things I say “yes” to and the things I say “no” to.

(For starters, this Thursday I cleared my schedule and just spent time with my family and also managed to go to the gym twice this week. All is right in the world again.)

This week, spend some time thinking about the things you say “yes” to, and consequently, what things you’re saying “no” to.

Right now, I’m going to say an emphatic “YES” to taking a nap. 🙌